WHEN GOD created Adam, the newly created man was all alone. There were not like-beings to talk to or to help. And God said, “It is NOT good that man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him.” So God created Eve as his wife and help meet.

We assume that hundreds of years later that Eve died and left Adam, again without a help meet. So if it was NOT good for Adam to be alone, why was he NOW alone without Eve, as has been the experience of so many since that time? They have been left alone through the loss of a faithful and loving mate.  Why? And is it even RIGHT to say that they are now alone, in the same way that Adam was alone before Eve was created for him?

There are two things:

When Adam was “alone” before Eve, he was the only human being on the planet. And without another creation (Eve), he would have remained so, with no one to help him tend the Garden. But hundreds of years later, or whenever Eve died, Adam was not “alone” in the same way or in the same sense.  But now Adam in fact had a society of fellow-humans around him to be companions and to help him when needed. He had children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, etc. So no longer could he be left ALONE on the planet.  Though he had lost his wife, he was NOT alone as he had been at one time before he was given a wife. Relatives and friends are not a substitute for a loving wife daily sticking by your side, but yet Adam was not alone as he was before.

That there WAS a loneliness that cannot be denied. And it had to be a great feeling of loneliness, just as a man today feels all alone when he loses his  wife!  But again, normally he has children left to help him, and for companionship; or he has grandchildren and grandchildren, or nieces and nephews. He has society around him, just as Adam did. So even naturally-speaking he is NOT entirely “alone.” This is a wise provision and mercy of a loving God.

Another thing is that in the meantime, Adam had fallen into SIN, casting all his race into being born with a sinful nature. In no sense did he deserve ANY mercy from God.  So alone or not, none could reply against God, for even life of any kind WAS NOT DESERVED!  Man in sinful rebellion against God has NO GROUNDS for thinking God is obligated to bless him with anything but eternal punishment to fulfill His raw justice. Whatever God does is right, and NO man has the right to reply, “What doest Thou?” (Daniel 4:35)

God is kind to all. Just as was the case with Adam, men and women today, have family and friends around them, even if few. What if they had NONE? What if they were left alone on the planet with NO ONE? If they are living, that is still mercy, even if they wish for death.

But this, practically speaking, does not assuage the loneliness they may feel at times. They may indeed feel to be alone in the world with none to help. For the believer in Christ, this, too, is turned for good by our Almighty God, for He purposes situations to get His people to turn more fully to Him and to trust and rely on Him. Thus He makes Himself known as the father to the fatherless, as the husband to the widows, as the comfort and help meet for lonely men who love and fear Him; even as the friend that sticketh closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:22,24:

“Whoso findeth a wife fineth a good thing, and obtaineth favor of the Lord.” . . . “A man that hath friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” 

And who is that but Jesus Christ our elder brother, and the bridegroom of His bride! In Him who is our All in All, we have all things and we can never be ALONE!  “. . . Be content with such things as ye have: for He hath said, I WILL never leave thee, nor forsake thee. So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my Helper. . . .” (Hebrews 13:5,6)

And think about this:

The Lord Jesus was given a number of people as His inheritance, to be His bride. For them he suffered and died to clean them up, to make them just like Him, conformed to His image. He was given a bride lying in sin and filth; that bride had to be made anew and prepared to be a holy bride fit for the Son of God. That is why He died, “to save His people from their sins.” And as a bride of Jesus Christ Himself, how long has it been that Christ has waited and yearned for that bride? And He still awaits the wedding and consummation in glory of a perfect bride without any spot or wrinkle, a bride that is covered with His own righteousness and made holy even like Himself? How long has He now been waiting for His prepared bride? How long has He been waiting for His resurrected and glorified bride? Oh, for Him and for us, THAT WILL BE THE DAY!  It will have been a long time in coming, but it IS coming, and we, too, just as He is, can look forward to that day.

It makes sense, then, and it shows the wisdom of God, that He would make this bride go through times of loneliness to make her yearn, as He yearns, to be with her heavenly Husband, and to learn to LIVE in dependence on Him as her Provider and Sustainer and the Lover of her soul, to show Himself the Husband of His bride.

Riva Tims, in her book “When It All Falls Apart,” makes this real and practical observation:

“I’ve learned through the painful process of transitioning for transformation that God allows us to be alone at times. The Word of God tells us that the Spirit of the Lord led Jesus into the wilderness, where He was tempted by the devil (Matt. 4:1). For a season God will seemingly isolate us from the rest of humanity, but He has a purpose for this time. In this season God teaches us to depend on Him. It is a time when recent wounds can be dressed and past scars healed. It is a season designed to increase our faith that God is, and has always been, sovereign. . . .

“The fact is, sometimes people can’t help you. And that is by design. In the wilderness God will sever all lifelines but His own.

“In these wilderness seasons, nobody answers you, no matter how hard or how loud you cry, ‘Help!’ God places you between the proverbial rock and a hard place.  . . .

“Desperation is always lurking in the shadows of the wilderness. Desperation is brought on by circumstances with which the mind struggles to cope. Desperation produces despondency, where the constant crashing of life’s waves causes a person to become disassociated from the world around him, unable to tell one blow from the next. . . .

“When God takes us into the wilderness, the best thing we can do is follow Jacob’s example and rest our head on the Rock, who is God.”

And for the believer living by faith (“the just shall live by faith”) all such experiences God uses for our good (Romans 8:28), even to bring us to trust and love Him more. Truly He will never leave us or forsake us. WE ARE NOT ALONE!

When We Feel So All Alone

Horatius Bonar (1808-1889) wrote:

“Night is around us still; but it is not merely one of weeping, it is also one of watching. No sorrow is to make us less watchful; nay, much more. So far from tribulation throwing us off our guard, it should lead to added vigilance. It prevents our falling asleep, as we should certainly do were all peaceful and prosperous. It makes the night more cold and bitter to us, thereby rendering us more weary of it, and more eager for the day. Were the night air mild, and the night sky clear, we should grow contented with it, and cease to watch for the day-break.

“This is our night-watch. To this the Master has appointed us during His absence. ‘Watch ye therefore: for ye know not when the master of the house cometh, at even, or at midnight, or at the cock-crowing, or in the morning: lest coming suddenly he find you sleeping. And what I say unto you I say unto all, Watch.” (Mark 13:35-37) It is the prospect or morning and of the Master’s return that keeps us watching—especially in these last days, when watch after watch has come and gone, and He has not yet arrived. ‘His going forth is prepared as the morning’ (Hosea 6:3); and that morning cannot now be distant.”